There are so many different kinds of sushi, I've lost count. Dig this--sushi basically refers to rice seasoned with a solution of sugar, vinegar and salt. The word maki means roll. The other words tell you what kind of sushi yer about to stuff in your big fat wigglin' piehole.
|Norimaki||Nori Seaweed Roll||This is the basic roll, captain. Nori seaweed on the outside, seasoned rice with a filling in the middle. This type of roll is made using a special Japanese bamboo mat called a "makisu."|
|Hosomaki||Small Roll||A kind of norimaki, but only made with half a sheet of nori and a single filling.|
|Futomaki||Big-Assed Roll||Another kind of norimaki, this roll typically has at least four different kinds of fillings and is muy thick, Jackson.|
|Uramaki||Inside Out Roll||This is a norimaki roll turned inside out in true swinger fashion (ever heard of The Lifestyle?) Nori surrounds one or more fillings in the middle and then gets surrounded by seasoned rice and optional sesame seeds on the outside. A wee-bit tricky to make, but not hard if you get smokin' with your trusty makisu. Impresses the Mrs.|
|Temaki||Hand Roll||Seasoned rice and fillings are stuffed into a hand-formed cone made out of nori seaweed. For extra flair, wear heels while crafting.|
|Nigiri||Finger Shaped Seasoned Rice with Topping||A little oval or oblong mound of seasoned rice is hand-formed and topped with a treat. A thin piece of nori can be used to wrap around the little bundle of joy. Fun for the whole family!|
|Gunkan||Battleship Finger Shaped Seasoned Rice||This a type of nigiri. A little oval or oblong mound of seasoned rice is hand formed. A piece of nori about 1/4 inch higher than the mound is wrapped around its perimeter. A loose or liquidey type of filling is placed on top of the rice and is held in place by the little nori overhang or railing. These look fancy, so save 'em for when the rabbi and his husband come over.|
|Inari||Aburage Tofu Pockets Stuffed with Seasoned Rice||If you can find canned aburage tofu, get out of the hot tub and grab that makisu. Just squeeze out the flavored tofu pockets, carefully open and stuff with seasoned rice. You can dip the top in roasted sesame seeds too. Even finicky Aunt Fusspudget will crow for seconds. I also like to use the aburage tofu as a filling in norimaki.|
Handy Things to Know:
I was horrified to learn that turducken is a specialty of numerous fucks around these parts, where I live, Southern Louisiana.
Serving Tip: sneak into your grandma's bedroom, plunge a syringe into her goiter, then empty the juices into a roasting pan, gently plop in turducken and marinate until a generous lawn of gray-white fuzz lines bottom of roaster. slice and enjoy. Happy Turduckening.